Reblog: Facebook douche of the day - The Oatmeal

Reblogging this:

Facebook douche of the day - The Oatmeal

Condoms are cheaper than bullets: a true story...

(with permission - and blessing - from The Prince himself, I'm writing this...)

Make love - not war.

We've all heard that line a GAJILLION times before. As much as we don't like lines and/or cliché's for that matter - it's true or at least SOME of it are.


Take...THE WEBSITE for example.


True, it does have a LOT of rules (the much dreaded T.O.S.) and not to mention a BAJILLION people in-charge of making sure that THE RULES are always kept. 


Yesterday - I witnessed something which was quite familiar to me - and top it all off, it happened in PUBLIC.


Which made me ask a LOT of things and not to mention wonder - without sounding like a prude and/or close to it - one of which were:


Whatever happened to respect? (for both elders - that goes for AGE on THE WEBSITE and AGE in real life and/or to The Admins?)


I grew up in THE WEBSITE. I learned a lot of things. A LOT!!! Mind you, I did.


And even before that - MOST of the people in it knew me before in the old days of Inter Relay Chat (mIRC). (Undernet Server - #vampires with Atlantis, Antilla and yes, Nicnivian who shouts ORIFICE!! every time YOU *yawn*)


A LOT of things have improved/changed over the years on THE WEBSITE.


List make a short-list:


1. Before (I was in September 2004) the ONLY way(s) that one person can interact with another would be to either reply on Forum posts AND/OR to change one's comment on a profile. 


Message Center didn't exist and nor did Blasting OR even The BOX!


2. (Unless ofcourse since DAY ONE you were already an Admin) NO ONE had the FREEDOM to "design" one's profile - or no one had Premmy.


Everything was red and black. 


NOW, as long as one's Premmy - we can do WHATEVER we want - and hey, even have a background song and hey, even know who dropped by to check, right?


3. And yes, NOW, we have Webcams among other things.


In life, I've learned that, you can never avoid the fact that there are just DAYS that you get pissed and/or insulted because you feel like you were given injustice and that you don't deserve this - that is true.


THE WEBSITE has seen a LOT of people who HOWLED for INJUSTICE.


The ones that were Suspended Until Infinity (and yes - beyond)


You know them - I think? Well, guess what? I do - know one. No names, but hey, here's proof:

See? He has my name as referral. Oh yes, you can say that I brought in the BAD one.


He seemed NICE at first (they all are - take note) and (maybe) even did a lil' contribution or two and THEN things got a little weird and poof, INFINITY (I think he was second honor on the INIFINITY list.)


There were others too - who were rude and not to mention had no respect and/or REMORSE of what they did.


I'm NOT saying that we should "kiss-ass" or "lick-boots", naw. That's just stupid! 


We were given THE WEBSITE and we can do whatever we "wanna" but of course, there's ALWAYS a limit. Like for example, before, on THE BOX - there was THE NO SWEARING (whatsoever) RULE - but it got lifted now. So yes, everyone can say whatever they want - even with words like F or (ahhh) cock as long as YOU will (quote):


- not make posts of a political nature.
- not make posts that ridicule the philosophical tenants of any religion.
- not make rude, obnoxious, hate, or flame posts.
- not make overly sexual posts.


Should you know, I was part of The Admins too - seriously!

I always kept this message (you'd be surprised what I keep in my SAVED MESSAGES)

It didn't last long (a week or two, I think? Probably - I forgot) BUT, WHAT I DID NOT forget was the fact that I FLAMED someone in PUBLIC.

I BIT SOMEONE'S HEAD OFF!

And the next day - before you can say SHAZAM - I was stripped off of everything! Even HIS mark.


Yes, I howled at that time, and NOT a day goes by that I did NOT forget what happened NOR did I NOT forget the scenarios that ran in my head - WHAT IF I didn't do it? What If? What if? a LOT of what ifs!


But all was for naught - I did it, I was dealt with. THE END.


I have learned from THAT incident that it's NOT proper to be RUDE and/or FIGHT - for that matter and MOST ESPECIALLY in public.


So, you see - NO ONE is safe and/or gets a free pass in flaming/being rude in the Vamp Box or ANYWHERE even Dominars or Admins, how much more the Regular Members?


And if you THINK that there's injustice in all that's happening to you and/or what has happened to you before - put yourself in the Admin's shoes:


It's NOT like we're sheep and/or cows being herded - we're PEOPLE, we THINK, we SQUIRM at instances that we feel like it and/or we feel like we've been given injustice. It's NOT easy.


And I'm sure in time, HE will deal with it - given that the matter (God forbid) will blow out into proportion. 


So, for now, if ever you feel like you've been given injustice and/or anything close - PLEASE, do NOT explode especially in public - THAT is never a good thing.


I'm NOT saying that I know everything about THE WEBSITE because I've been there ever since, no. BUT, if you will, learn from my story - it's the truth. And it always has been.


Be ye therefore wise as serpents,and harmless as doves. - Matthew 10:16

Ice Breaker...

[Puerto Princesa, Palawan; Philippines] 

These two got married on Valentines DAY (yesterday) - amidst the rain and yes, FLOOD.

Question, is THIS better than: 

1. Jumping in on a train (refer to previous post) 

2. Worse

3. Same thing?

4. NONE of the above

And yes, I need reasons. Comment; private message or whatever.

Anything YOU can think of.

And a NOT happy valentines day to you too....

Hours from now, it will be The 14th of February.

I LOATHE THIS DAY

And no, not because I love vampires - and whatnot, NAW. Those reasons are a cliché and not to mention childish..

THIS day, is everyone's excuse to bring something annoying - like PINK BALLOONS for example. And yes, roses - chocolates and everything that Hallmark has.

When I was in Manila - the big baddest city of the country - full of (again) pickpockets - and the likes, every 14th day of February, there's an eight out of ten chance that the train service would be out of service for the day.

A few - like five - would jump in front of the train and WHAMMMMMM!

Well, some would jump off from electrics posts - jump from buildings - and yes, jump in front of a speeding bus/truck - but, I think the TRAIN WRECK tops all.

Get the picture?

Yep, you do.

Yesterday, I did this:

Pre-Valentines Day MASSACRE with Three Men and the intercession of Jesus and all saints..

In short, I HAD a three-some with THREE fine men - fine AND expensive...but, hey, fun. AND, yes, Jesus was there too.

So, yes, THIS is a bitter post and not to mention desperate and you might think it's uncalled for - but, nah.


The way, I see it, celebrate TODAY or ANY OTHER day with something you love and in the not-so-distant-future (please God, NOT after I'm thirty) someone you love.


For now, I'll give bitter love - acid care AND be cyanotic while at it.


What about you? ;)


Cheers!

Can I view your private photos?

Privacy is IMPORTANT, of course it is!


I forgot the title of that old movie - which had the line "In time the only private place will be your mind - and even that's questionable."


Obviously, if you're reading this - you have Internet. You have Google - YAHOO - MSN - Facebook and oi, you have a profile on THE WEBSITE too.


Recently - 23:48:11, Feb 11 2011 (my time) - a forum post was made on THE WEBSITE. And it talked about privacy.


Which is kind of funny really. Because MOST of the people that have replied on the forum post of THE WEBSITE have been registered for more than a year or so.


Let's point out facts:


1. If you search something on the Internet - ANYTHING - (especially on Google) there'd be a MILLION results even for just a simple thing alone, like the word CAT for example.


2. If you Google your REAL NAME - anything (as long as it's online) that has YOUR name in it will pop out on the search results (still Google as example). Exhibit A (MY name):

If YOU click on the first link, you'll see this:

My page on EzineArticles.com - it's the JOB.


3. Pr.checker.info ranks websites - and I checked to see the rank for THE WEBSITE.

So, if you Google your name or ANYTHING that's connected to you and you have it ON YOUR PAGE on THE WEBSITE - there's a 4 out of 10 chance that ANYTHING about you will appear on Google. (And THAT's only on one ranking site - what about the others?)


4. If ALL three doesn't make sense, please check left hand side of Google which you'll see:

Now, back to more ramblings - WHAT I think is, that almost everyone (or those who were ahhhh "ALARMED") anyways, wants ABSOLUTE privacy. Like one would NOT exist in the Internet, because some are scared of being discovered by:


1. colleagues
2. classmates
3. exes
4. parents
5. boyfriend/girlfriend


Questions:


1. Why did you join if you do not WANT to be seen or heard from? (Google a SMILEY face and change your profile picture!)


2. True, we get to "design" our own profiles and/or write on YOUR journals and whatnots - BUT, is it NOT OUR responsibility to (being blunt) "cover your ass?"


And yes, a VERY FUNNY THING. On the forums, one said:

Reviewing THE WEBSITE's Terms of Service we can read that:

Maybe we're confusing THE WEBSITE with Facebook - which has a LOCK on everything, mind you and NOT to mention block too.


Which is pretty handy at times, that is true. BUT THEN AGAIN, THE WEBSITE is NOT Facebook. 


Facebook is number ONE - TIME MAGAZINE - duh?!?! which means more traffic = more MONEY - and MORE MONEY means MORE updates for the profiles/websites. 


Yes, Mr. Mark Zuckerberg is happy camper!


I'm sure, that in time THE WEBSITE will have MORE updates - like the Webcam for example, as one of the first ones there - it HAS BEEN TALKED ABOUT eversince and NOW or latter part of 2010 - it finally came to being. 


Mr. C. is working on MORE fun stuff for all of us - I bet a BODY part he is.


So, brace yourself - protect your content - and, yes, MOST importantly don't bother messaging the Admins - they have more pressing concerns; everyone has a life even out of THE WEBSITE.


P.S.


KUDOS to the one who said this:

Oh yeah?!?!?!

Today, is a TUESDAY. And I can say that it's NOT the best day in the entire creation!

Work = deadlines + added stuff to do; edit - proofread.

And yes, I have been promoted to Assistant House Master for the House that I've always been in on THE WEBSITE. You can now call me proud AND confused AHM.

Pressure AND Adrenaline and not to mention the "little" crying inside for a bit.

AND THEN something happened on the WEBSITE and as much as I am SHAMEFUL that this had to happen; I am glad that I VENTED it all out to this person:

1. If THIS person were ON THE WEBSITE on 2003 - Was this person's profile SYSTEM?!?!


2. If THIS person were ON THE WEBSITE on 2004, surely THIS person would recognize me even with clothes on.


I DO NOT usually engage with fights and/or arguments - obviously this is a pissing contest.


BUT, TODAY is not just the DAY to eat CAKE and I'm sorry for that.


Bear with me....


P.S.

Know your WEBSITE's history.

With dreams, with drugs, with waking nightmares, alcohol and cock and endless balls...

The title of this post is a line taken from the poem Howl (and other poems) by Allen Ginsberg.


A lot of people would DIE to interpret the poem - but then again, you can't interpret poetry - that's why it's called THAT.


I, however, will not try and interpret Howl or any other poem for that matter, but I'll divide this post into sections: "Dreams; Drugs; Walking Nightmares; Alcohol - Cock and Endless balls."

Dreams

I had a bad dream last week - a SICK one.


I was in a circle jerk. A LOT (like 10 or more) boys were in it. And what's more it was in PUBLIC (an internet shop) and what's WORSE, I KNOW someone PERSONALLY.


I told J, my friend AND voice of reason, (who also had a dream last week) about this dream. And flat out he said: You need to get out of where you are; and DO IT often. (Rough paraphrasing.)


Yes, I'm 25, I live in a third world country in the far east; alone; I am SINGLE; and TO TOP IT ALL OFF, I haven't DONE IT in a loooong while.


Yes, it's true. As ICKY as this sounds, IT IS THE TRUTH.


I dunno, maybe I get scared? Maybe I'm just playing safe OR maybe I'm JUST not ready for it - again.


I block or flap every thought and/or insinuation about IT with work - article this, article that.


I'm like Glinda - minus the shimmering blonde hair and BELTING voice that can do a B flat - inside a bubble. Distant from the world. And not letting ANYONE else in it.


Maybe I'm looking for love? Which is a UNICORN.


What about you, have YOU found your Unicorn?

Drugs 

What is YOUR drug? 


Naw, not the one where you need a torniquet AND a long-ass-gauge-needle.


What gets you going? 


Everyday we work - we go to school - we do the things that WE SHOULD do in the world in order to survive the proverbial battle of the wild.


I dunno what keeps me going. When I was working behind a desk before; the boss asked us to bring a picture of SOMETHING that would motivate us to work harder.


Everyone brought a picture of their:


1. dream house
2. dream IPod (it was 2006)
3. dream car
4. a yacht
5. a helicopter


I however, young-er; dumb-er that I am now, brought a picture of a BOOK (A Dirty Job by Christoper Moore - HARDBOUND - it was expensive) and I didn't know better that time and maybe even now.


That was before, the DRIVE to get THIS or THAT book would make me work and do something just to get it, but that was before, NOW, I don't know - maybe just the WILL to live?


Awhile back this afternoon - after lunch - I had a TOOTH AND NAIL fight with my editor OVER THE DARN PHONE - a long distance one (from the state of California); all because ONE of the article that I wrote "didn't sound good."


I do take things seriously - should you know - and this is the JOB. And I really shouldn't just ignore it or hell, SLACK like the pig that I am.


But then again, when someone bites you - you bite back, right? I always make my articles "sound good" entertaining even and NOT sounding like an encyclopedia and/or a Bible thumper that would go door-to-door. I add a lil' sugar - spice and everything nice!


In the end, I won the TOOTH and NAIL fight. Kind of unscathed, but still THAT moment made me think and ponder even.


Professionalism is good - always - but when one pisses on your work after you've suffered hours upon hours of working on it; THAT's another story.


It's work. It's a dirty job.


And to quote a very good friend and mentor it pees the bells.

Waking Nightmares

There are just times in a day when you sit down and THINK of the days before - a waking nightmare, if you will.


Before all of THIS - the lappy top; the job which pees the bells - I HAD NOTHING.


When I was young-er and dumb-er and a student I relied or rather LEECHED on my mom. And I BELIEVED that whatever happens mom will be there to pick me up and brush those bruises on my knees.


Thus the reason I CHOSE to go to the university/college out of town and be away from home - because I know everything will be alright, mom's there.


Rather than getting a course or degree which would help me with life - and NOT to mention one that would surely get me a higher pay - like a nurse or a doctor or hell; one course than you can use in times of emergencies - like the upcoming Zombie Apocalypse for example.


I chose a course that I love - one where I can EAT books and talk about BOOKS. Bachelor in Secondary Education: Major in Literature; minor in linguistics.


Antoine de Saint-Exupéry - Balzac - Chekov - Dante -  Dostoevsky - Faulkner - Flaubert - de Maupassant - Goethe - Kafka - Salinger - Shakespeare - Tolstoy - Williams - Zola. You name it; I ate them all way back in college.


I barely survived the university - NOT as being the one who gets bullied all the time, but by being drunk in class or high even (pot was a bestfriend - along with Kurt Kobain, John Lennon and NIN and yes, Anne Rice) I was 17.


Then my parents broke up DURING graduation (no one walked me down the aisle) - I got shattered by it. 


I ran away from home - to the big baddest city and capital of the country (Manila) filled with crooks, illegal recruiters, hookers, pickpockets, swindlers and drug dealers.

I worked at contact centers - galore - which catered customers from other countries, mainly the United States and/or Europe.


I became a lot of things while in a contact center:


1. Telemarketer - annoying job and not to mention FOR the customer


"Hello my name is ________, from CARLSON; AVAYA; KODAK; WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION; TUPPERWARE; SPRINT; AT&T"


2. Customer service - annoying job too
3. Quality Assurance - listened to calls 
4. Accent trainer
5. And then finally - BOSS (of Accent trainers)


And regardless if I had income and I was told one too many times to save - I didn't listen. Rather than saving, I SPLURGED all of it with online games. I was 21.


From Defense of the Ancients - World of Warcraft down to Zelda, you name it.


And yes, BOOKS - for someone who lives in a very small town with no bookstore (it's TRUE) the INSTANT you see a glossy hardbound book of (for example) "Laurell K. Hamilton's DANCE MACABRE - you grab it and pay it no matter what the cost.


Then the BOMB dropped like that one of Hiroshima and Pearl Harbor combined. The company went bankrupt and they had to CUT - I was part of it.


And then everything just went BLACK. I won't tell you about it anymore - it was just PLAIN BAD.


BUT, now - with a different perspective of things - I KNOW that I should probably be a bit wiser now; given that I've learned THE HARD WAY that the people aren't universalists, but rather individualists.


And to NEVER GO BACK to the darkplace ever - EVER - again.

Alcohol - Cock and Endless balls.

If there's one thing I learned, that is important, is to never take things literally.


And so should you.


NO, this section isn't about "Alcohol - Cock and Endless balls" LITERALLY, no.


It's happiness or at least that's what I THINK those three are. A lil' joy of sorts - minus the sexual innuendos.


If there's one thing a person could be proud of, it's when their work is appreciated or commended even.


I do too - especially with this blog - and it's wonderful to know, really, that some read THIS.

I get to know which countries have read me (who lives in Israel?) and yes, the browser AND thingamajig that people use or YOU - are using.

But then again, I can't help but be annoyed AND at the same time laugh because I'm just too jaded to argue.

Like messages and/blasts for example:

And you have no choice but to just SMILE and GRIN AND BORE IT - because you're nice and good and you don't want to break a nerve or have an aneurysm just because of a lil' annoyance.

But these lil' things give color to life - well, for me at least; the readers, the occasional nut that would drop by and give you random stuff.

Just like show-business  - it won't work without "fans."

And with that, I bid you good night, dear reader - be safe; a storm, as they say, is on it's way.

Stay Warm! ☼